Safe BDSM: Which Dominant Should The Submissive Avoid?
Everyday, there are tons of people who are introduced to the world of BDSM and venture into it. Everyday, most of these people come out scarred and scared, vowing never to venture into that world. The problem is not with the lifestyle, the people who venture, or even the kind of people they meet. The problem basically lies with the compatibility between the two people. Actually speaking, even in a more mainstream love relationship, it is very difficult to meet the person whom you are completely compatible with. If you are following the BDSM lifestyle, and are on the lookout to have a relationship with a dominant, keep away from people who have these traits:
Too Adventurous:
A little adventurous is okay, and everyone need some kind of adventure as a spice to rev up their romantic life and lifestyle, but that shouldn't mean that the dominant would get kicks from pushing you into the lake when they have the explicit information that you do not know how to swim. Actually, you should keep your eyes open around dominants, and try to see what their 'level of adventure' is, because a person's level of adventure increases as the time goes by.
This does not mean that even a hint of adventure is unacceptable, and then, a BDSM relationship is a kind of adventure in itself. However, if the dominant has something in mind which may seem adventurous, or out of the way, he or she should confide in the submissives before enacting anything like that.
Micromanager:
Some dominants are not dominants, but are abusers, plain and simple. These kinds of dominants take BDSM to such a level, that they blur all lines of consensual, non consensual, power exchange, etc. These people are basically mentally sick people who play mental games with innocents and scar them for life.
Micromanagers will be people who will come at you so fast and so deep that you will not understand what's going on. From getting your phone number to disconnecting your broadband connection, these people will delve into your personal life within the shortest possible time. Make sure that you raise an alarm as soon as you find any behavior that might seem weird to you.
Kinksters:
There are people who are actually interested in the lifestyle, but also have a love for some kinks, that are part and parcel of a BDSM life. Like someone would like ropeplay, or someone else would like BDSM, or someone would also like ponyplay. It is all well and good if the dominant has a healthy interest in the concept of BDSM as well as the kink, but make sure that the dominant is not in it just for the kink, because interests in kinks fade off, and so does the communication levels between the people brought together via the kink.
Too Adventurous:
A little adventurous is okay, and everyone need some kind of adventure as a spice to rev up their romantic life and lifestyle, but that shouldn't mean that the dominant would get kicks from pushing you into the lake when they have the explicit information that you do not know how to swim. Actually, you should keep your eyes open around dominants, and try to see what their 'level of adventure' is, because a person's level of adventure increases as the time goes by.
This does not mean that even a hint of adventure is unacceptable, and then, a BDSM relationship is a kind of adventure in itself. However, if the dominant has something in mind which may seem adventurous, or out of the way, he or she should confide in the submissives before enacting anything like that.
Micromanager:
Some dominants are not dominants, but are abusers, plain and simple. These kinds of dominants take BDSM to such a level, that they blur all lines of consensual, non consensual, power exchange, etc. These people are basically mentally sick people who play mental games with innocents and scar them for life.
Micromanagers will be people who will come at you so fast and so deep that you will not understand what's going on. From getting your phone number to disconnecting your broadband connection, these people will delve into your personal life within the shortest possible time. Make sure that you raise an alarm as soon as you find any behavior that might seem weird to you.
Kinksters:
There are people who are actually interested in the lifestyle, but also have a love for some kinks, that are part and parcel of a BDSM life. Like someone would like ropeplay, or someone else would like BDSM, or someone would also like ponyplay. It is all well and good if the dominant has a healthy interest in the concept of BDSM as well as the kink, but make sure that the dominant is not in it just for the kink, because interests in kinks fade off, and so does the communication levels between the people brought together via the kink.
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