We want to examine some personal skills we can develop in an effort to make our relationship healthy and strong.  These skills are not difficult to develop, because we all have them inborn of us.  Therefore, we all have the overflowing capacity to build, nurture and get the most out of it in the interest of the relationship.  We can, with a little painless effort.

Listening as a Tool

As a two-way street, listening is a powerful skill you both need to develop enthusiastically.  You want to be listened to.  You are to listen to your partner.  This is done not passively but actively.

By listening to each other, you are both able to gain an understanding of what the other person is trying to convey.  In the process, you also get the benefit of his or her thoughts and intentions as much as possible. 

By not listening, the opposite is the case.  When we do not listen, tendency is that people are misunderstood.  For example, we get the wrong idea of what the other person is trying to say, and come up with wrong impressions, wrong conclusions or both.  All of this can put avoidable pressure on the relationship.

Avoiding Human Error

Picture this scenario.  When in a two-way traffic, vehicle operators are on the alert--watching out for vehicles coming the opposite direction.  You as a vehicle operator will constantly be on the watch out.   You watch out for on-coming traffic. In the same way, on-coming vehicle operators watch out for you. This mutual exchange of ‘benefits,' makes for smooth driving and also contributes immensely to make the roads safer for all.  The ultimate result is that vehicle operators are safe and the vehicles are safe.

The analogy is explained in this way.  You and your partners are the vehicle operators.  The vehicle is the relationship.  The roadway in which you are traveling is the path of the relationship.  If there were any mishaps on the road it is as a result of the handling of the vehicle by the operators.  This means, that as it is with most airplane crashes, it is as a result of human error, not mechanical fault.

A Partner is ‘King'

The success or failure of any relationship hinges on how we take care of, and defer to one another.  Those in business know this too well and have used the principle to advantage. To a business person, the customer is king.  In relationship, your partner is ‘king'- a gender neutral tag.  Respect and honor him or her as such. The dividends are worth it.  It works better for the partner and works better for the relationship.  Ultimately both partners are better off for it.

 If most people played back the tape of each session of their dates, they would be shocked at what they would probably come away with.  Different emotions would be stirred after watching and listening to such a review.

Few people, if any, are inherently evil, and few people, if any, are inherently good.  The culprit is our Adamic nature.  And of course, the other culprit is the environment we grew up in.  We couldn't do anything and cannot do anything now about that environment.  But we can do a lot about our attitude and mannerisms.

Is your relationship stable, strong and promising?  If not, we have valuable resources to help you build a strong and healthy relationship you would be proud to have.  We invite you to visit us today at helpful relationship advice for these materials.  You would be glad you did.