- 1). Involve your stepchildren in the wedding planning. Children may feel like they have no say when a parent remarries. Including them in the planning will let them know that they are a valuable part of this new blended family. Children can help with the planning in many ways. Children can assemble wedding invitations, affix postage stamps to envelopes, make suggestions regarding reception locations, music, wedding colors, themes and even the guest list.
- 2). Give your stepchildren a role in the ceremony. There is no better way to make stepchildren feel like a special part of the new family than to give them a part to play in the ceremony that brings the family together. Including stepchildren in the ceremony sends the message that they are valued, loved, respected and appreciated members of the new household. Stepchildren of all ages, whether preschool or adult, would be honored to stand beside their parents as they say their wedding vows. If space at the altar is limited, stepchildren can also light candles, sprinkle flower petals down the aisle, serve as ushers, be ring bearers, recite poetry or sing at the ceremony or reception.
- 3). Include your stepchildren in the wedding vows. Making vows to love, cherish and protect your stepchildren at the same time that you make those vows to your new spouse will solidify your commitment to your stepchildren and your new role as a parent to them. Making this declaration publicly lets them know that they are a significant, integral part of your life. This knowledge is important to set the tone for your new family and life together.
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