Recovering from heartbreak can take a while, but the men who read and follow the steps discussed here should recover more quickly.
The sense of loss is tangible - it's as if someone in the family died.
You can't just go out and start seeing women again - it's too early, you're not ready, and you'll scare off most decent women.
Stay calm, read this article and plan to observe the stages and get back to your life.
The severity of the pain you're feeling will have a great impact on how long you remain at each stage of this process.
Stage One: Acknowledgment After she's left you, you've got to accept that she's not coming back.
She's moved on; the relationship is over.
The time you passed together is all in the past now.
You cannot spend time with her.
This has got to be one of the toughest times a man will go through, because your relationship is dead, she doesn't want to be with you, and dealing with the thought of that seems just too much to bear - yet the thought of the breakup keeps going through your mind, over and over again, so that it seems as if your heart won't let itself be healed.
As time goes by, though, you realize that you can bear it.
Nothing good happens quickly, and no matter how good your relationship was, now that it's over, the most good that can happen is that you get over it.
And slowly, that's just what happens, as you gradually find yourself able to admit to yourself that she's gone, and the relationship has ended - yet you're still there.
Stage Two: Grieving is natural and necessary You're at the stage now where you've accepted that she's gone and the relationship is over.
In many ways, you've come to terms with the death of the relationship, and just as you'd grieve for the death of someone close to you, it's proper and natural to grieve for a lost relationship.
Don't feel ashamed or reluctant to cry if you're inclined to do so - don't hold back.
It's a natural feeling and a good way to relieve the tension building emotionally.
Stage Three: Outrage At this stage of the process, believe it or not, the natural, normal, typical feeling you're going through is anger.
Facts are immaterial - you had a life, a good life together, and then she ruined it all by walking out.
You did everything you could to make the relationship work and yet she didn't appreciate it - she abandoned you.
Your wrath is normal - but it's something you cannot actually take out on her.
This is one time you've got to control and channel your emotions carefully.
Stage Four: Is it time, don't you think, to start meeting new women? How do you feel? You should now be over your grief and over your sense of loss.
If the anger is subsiding, it may be time again to venture forth and start meeting people again - especially women.
You've been holding yourself back because you knew it was important to work out for yourself the reality of your relationship ending.
When your anger toward your ex has subsided (and it could be a while), it's finally time for you to go out and start familiarizing yourself with the new reality - there are literally millions of women out there around your age who are looking for just the right man to spend time and have fun with! Stage Five: Free at last! Finally, you've freed yourself from the emotional bondage to the failed relationship.
You're as free as a bird now because you're also no longer bound to her by any special feelings.
Sure, you may feel friendship or even affection for her (although these feelings usually come later on), but it doesn't pain you to hear news of her, and you don't feel guilty when you talk with another woman or take her out to dinner.
This is the stage they're talking about when they say "Get on with your life!" You're come back, back to the swing of things.
Enjoy!
The sense of loss is tangible - it's as if someone in the family died.
You can't just go out and start seeing women again - it's too early, you're not ready, and you'll scare off most decent women.
Stay calm, read this article and plan to observe the stages and get back to your life.
The severity of the pain you're feeling will have a great impact on how long you remain at each stage of this process.
Stage One: Acknowledgment After she's left you, you've got to accept that she's not coming back.
She's moved on; the relationship is over.
The time you passed together is all in the past now.
You cannot spend time with her.
This has got to be one of the toughest times a man will go through, because your relationship is dead, she doesn't want to be with you, and dealing with the thought of that seems just too much to bear - yet the thought of the breakup keeps going through your mind, over and over again, so that it seems as if your heart won't let itself be healed.
As time goes by, though, you realize that you can bear it.
Nothing good happens quickly, and no matter how good your relationship was, now that it's over, the most good that can happen is that you get over it.
And slowly, that's just what happens, as you gradually find yourself able to admit to yourself that she's gone, and the relationship has ended - yet you're still there.
Stage Two: Grieving is natural and necessary You're at the stage now where you've accepted that she's gone and the relationship is over.
In many ways, you've come to terms with the death of the relationship, and just as you'd grieve for the death of someone close to you, it's proper and natural to grieve for a lost relationship.
Don't feel ashamed or reluctant to cry if you're inclined to do so - don't hold back.
It's a natural feeling and a good way to relieve the tension building emotionally.
Stage Three: Outrage At this stage of the process, believe it or not, the natural, normal, typical feeling you're going through is anger.
Facts are immaterial - you had a life, a good life together, and then she ruined it all by walking out.
You did everything you could to make the relationship work and yet she didn't appreciate it - she abandoned you.
Your wrath is normal - but it's something you cannot actually take out on her.
This is one time you've got to control and channel your emotions carefully.
Stage Four: Is it time, don't you think, to start meeting new women? How do you feel? You should now be over your grief and over your sense of loss.
If the anger is subsiding, it may be time again to venture forth and start meeting people again - especially women.
You've been holding yourself back because you knew it was important to work out for yourself the reality of your relationship ending.
When your anger toward your ex has subsided (and it could be a while), it's finally time for you to go out and start familiarizing yourself with the new reality - there are literally millions of women out there around your age who are looking for just the right man to spend time and have fun with! Stage Five: Free at last! Finally, you've freed yourself from the emotional bondage to the failed relationship.
You're as free as a bird now because you're also no longer bound to her by any special feelings.
Sure, you may feel friendship or even affection for her (although these feelings usually come later on), but it doesn't pain you to hear news of her, and you don't feel guilty when you talk with another woman or take her out to dinner.
This is the stage they're talking about when they say "Get on with your life!" You're come back, back to the swing of things.
Enjoy!
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