The first question that you must ask yourself before you even think about getting them back is is there any love left between you? If your self-esteem is supported by your connection to that person then you need to have a look at yourself first before you even think about getting back together with that person.
It is very important that you know your true feelings toward that person,because if you don't love them,than trying to get an ex back just wont work.
Now you must ask yourself what was the cause of the breakup,what did i do wrong that tore us apart.
You need to identify the problem and try to fix it,because if you don't you will end up falling into the same pattern as before and you will end up probably breaking up within a week or two.
This must be avoided at all cost as it will become harder and harder to try and convince your ex that you have changed.
If you have overcome the first two steps than your almost there.
Now you just need to make a commitment,i mean nothing will happen without commitment right?Now depending on what level you were at before the breakup you must put all of your energy into making this work,also your partner must show the same commitment as well if it is going to work out for the two of you.
So in trying to get an ex back you should start with yourself, first.
When your spouse sees that you are serious, he or she will then join you.