I recently received an email from a wife whose husband had been having an emotional affair with a coworker.
The husband claimed that the affair had never turned physical or had "never crossed the line," but the wife had her doubts about this.
She had seen some texts and emails which suggested a close intimacy between the two and this was driving her crazy.
The husband was insisting that everything was in the past and that he was committed to his marriage.
The wife wanted to know how she could confirm this.
She asked if there was any way to know if the emotional affair was over once and for all.
I'll offer some things to look at to determine he's done with this other person in the following article.
Take A Look At The Evidence That Isn't Immediately Visible: Often, we know about an affair not because of what we see, but because of what we feel.
We just know that something is off and that his feelings and his attention are somewhere else.
We feel this in our core.
We can see that how he looks at us and responds to us is different.
Likewise, when the affair is over, we can sense that things have changed.
We notice that he's paying more attention, is more interested, and is more present.
Now, some caution should be taken here because sometimes when men know that you're onto them and they want to keep carrying on with the other person, they will bring out some acting that is deserving of an academy award because they are trying to buy themselves time with the other person and they are trying to throw you off the trail.
To keep this from happening, be very attentive and look at the totality of the situation.
Additionally, keep your eye on the evidence that is concrete and easy to confirm.
If You Feel That You Need To, Check Up On His Claims That The Emotional Affair Is Really Over: If your gut is telling you that the emotional affair isn't over, then it's probably not a bad idea to check up on this.
Of course, you don't want to do this in a manner that he's going to know about.
If you're wrong, then he will pretend that he is the one who is wronged and this is going to erode the trust and the relationship even more.
Since the wife had already found texts and emails, it was a logical assumption that there would be more.
This is a hard habit to break and I doubted very much that he had broken it if in fact he was still carrying on with his coworker.
What he was probably doing, however, was being very careful about deleting these things immediately after reading them.
Most people do not realize that just deleting these things and emptying your recycle bin does not erase them forever.
With the right tools, the wife could easily go right along behind him, get these things back, read them, and then print them out if need be.
The truth is, people will sometimes justify continuing an emotional affair because "nothing physical is happening" and no one is getting hurt.
But, that assumption is not always true.
The wife was being hurt very much.
And she deserved to know the truth to help her to decide if she still believed in her husband and wanted to save the marriage.
The husband claimed that the affair had never turned physical or had "never crossed the line," but the wife had her doubts about this.
She had seen some texts and emails which suggested a close intimacy between the two and this was driving her crazy.
The husband was insisting that everything was in the past and that he was committed to his marriage.
The wife wanted to know how she could confirm this.
She asked if there was any way to know if the emotional affair was over once and for all.
I'll offer some things to look at to determine he's done with this other person in the following article.
Take A Look At The Evidence That Isn't Immediately Visible: Often, we know about an affair not because of what we see, but because of what we feel.
We just know that something is off and that his feelings and his attention are somewhere else.
We feel this in our core.
We can see that how he looks at us and responds to us is different.
Likewise, when the affair is over, we can sense that things have changed.
We notice that he's paying more attention, is more interested, and is more present.
Now, some caution should be taken here because sometimes when men know that you're onto them and they want to keep carrying on with the other person, they will bring out some acting that is deserving of an academy award because they are trying to buy themselves time with the other person and they are trying to throw you off the trail.
To keep this from happening, be very attentive and look at the totality of the situation.
Additionally, keep your eye on the evidence that is concrete and easy to confirm.
If You Feel That You Need To, Check Up On His Claims That The Emotional Affair Is Really Over: If your gut is telling you that the emotional affair isn't over, then it's probably not a bad idea to check up on this.
Of course, you don't want to do this in a manner that he's going to know about.
If you're wrong, then he will pretend that he is the one who is wronged and this is going to erode the trust and the relationship even more.
Since the wife had already found texts and emails, it was a logical assumption that there would be more.
This is a hard habit to break and I doubted very much that he had broken it if in fact he was still carrying on with his coworker.
What he was probably doing, however, was being very careful about deleting these things immediately after reading them.
Most people do not realize that just deleting these things and emptying your recycle bin does not erase them forever.
With the right tools, the wife could easily go right along behind him, get these things back, read them, and then print them out if need be.
The truth is, people will sometimes justify continuing an emotional affair because "nothing physical is happening" and no one is getting hurt.
But, that assumption is not always true.
The wife was being hurt very much.
And she deserved to know the truth to help her to decide if she still believed in her husband and wanted to save the marriage.
Source...