Excerpted from, Endless Referrals: Network Your Everyday Contacts into Sales 3rd Edition

We?ve seen throughout this chapter how giving ? being a true giver and connector of others ? results in an abundance of business coming back to you. We?ve even viewed several scenarios based on my own personal network. Let?s now look at a personal experience of mine, and conclude the chapter by meeting a woman who?s giving spirit has resulted in her building a wildly successful business, which you can absolutely duplicate.

Giving First: A Personal Experience

I?d like to share with you a story from my own business that embodies this point.

Several years after I had begun speaking professionally, there was a corporate client (one with many divisions) that I was trying to land. Not only could I not seem to get a foot in the door, I couldn?t even find the door to try and stick my foot in. These people seemed to be invisible.

About this time, at one of the first National Speakers Association conventions I attended, I happened to meet a man who had been speaking professionally for quite some time. I struck up a friendship with him and his family, and began looking forward to seeing them at various events. During this entire time, despite the fact that I knew he was quite successful, I never asked him for anything. I did, however, help him as much as I could.

Several times, when I was unable to accept an engagement because I was already booked for that date, I would refer him to the company that had called me. Having articles published fairly often in magazines, I would refer him to the editor as a possible writer.

This was appreciated by all parties, of course, and didn?t take anything from me in any way. (This is one of the great things about giving: it helps everyone and hurts no one.)

A couple of years after meeting this gentleman, I discovered that the client I had been unsuccessfully seeking was a major client of his. Now, I probably could have come right out and asked him for help, but I didn?t feel that would be quite right. I didn?t want him to feel that because I had gone out of my way for him, he ?owed? me anything. But I did feel comfortable asking for his advice on how I might best pursue this corporation.

I said, ?I know this is a huge client of yours, and I?m not in any way asking you to make a connection for me. But I?d love to know what you think is the best way for me to go about contacting the right person, so I can at least get the opportunity to establish and develop a relationship with them.?

He would have none of that. He said, ?I?ll have the gentleman who?s my main contact call you.? And he did. Over the years since, that client, together will all the spin-off engagements I?ve had within that company?s umbrella, has accounted for several million dollars in sales.

That was not the first, and certainly not the only time, that giving first has literally paid big financial dividends. It?s the way I run my business; it?s the way I run my life. Giving first works.