Healing from the past is hard but it is possible and it is worth it.
However, it will mean digging up lots of painful feelings that you have most likely spent years trying to bury.
When these are uncovered it will be very tempting to rebury them and there is no shame in feeling this and you will know if it is too much for you to take, if this is true for you then there is nothing wrong in reburying the feeling and coming back to it later when the timing is better.
Don't feel disheartened if you have to do this, see it as a positive step that you were ready to attempt to tackle it even if you didn't get very far with it this time you tried.
Before even attempting to deal with any emotions ensure you are in a place you consider safe with people you trust implicitly or alone if this is what you prefer.
The important part is that you feel completely safe and relaxed.
The emotions you release are usually intense and painful and so be prepared to cry.
You cannot heal from the past unless you also feel it, since you have become so used to burying these feelings you now need to give yourself permission to feel them completely, however difficult and painful this may be.
Remind yourself that feeling these emotions are the only way to heal from them.
To start working on your past focus on a specific incident but be aware that working in this way usually goes in a direction of its own and so be prepared to work on areas that you weren't originally planning to work on.
Allow yourself to return back to that experience and feel the emotions that you felt then.
Usually, once you start feeling one emotion the rest will come of their own accord.
Allow yourself to both feel and express whatever it is that you're feeling.
If the pain or experience you are focusing on is particularly intense it is possible to get stuck in the past and the emotions associated such as guilt, worthlessness and/or unlovable.
This is a difficult spot but in order to get out of this make a conscious decision to leave the emotions in the past where they belong, tell yourself that you have done well this time but it is too hard to work on this any more and you will come back to it later.
 Sometimes, especially if the past hurts are associated with abuse or serious trauma then the emotions will be too intense to deal with in this way.
If this is true then the best way to deal with these is through therapy.
However, if you are not ready or prepared for this then there are other ways to deal with this.
Try keeping a journal of your thoughts/feelings associated with that time of your life; often, things that affected us in the past also affect our present and a journal can help to link the two and therefore enable you to move on.
Talk to people you trust - you may find people have been through a similar situation and are able to offer support and guidance.
Finally, many people find creative writing, art or music very effective ways to release deep, intense emotions that may otherwise be too hard to work through.
However, it will mean digging up lots of painful feelings that you have most likely spent years trying to bury.
When these are uncovered it will be very tempting to rebury them and there is no shame in feeling this and you will know if it is too much for you to take, if this is true for you then there is nothing wrong in reburying the feeling and coming back to it later when the timing is better.
Don't feel disheartened if you have to do this, see it as a positive step that you were ready to attempt to tackle it even if you didn't get very far with it this time you tried.
Before even attempting to deal with any emotions ensure you are in a place you consider safe with people you trust implicitly or alone if this is what you prefer.
The important part is that you feel completely safe and relaxed.
The emotions you release are usually intense and painful and so be prepared to cry.
You cannot heal from the past unless you also feel it, since you have become so used to burying these feelings you now need to give yourself permission to feel them completely, however difficult and painful this may be.
Remind yourself that feeling these emotions are the only way to heal from them.
To start working on your past focus on a specific incident but be aware that working in this way usually goes in a direction of its own and so be prepared to work on areas that you weren't originally planning to work on.
Allow yourself to return back to that experience and feel the emotions that you felt then.
Usually, once you start feeling one emotion the rest will come of their own accord.
Allow yourself to both feel and express whatever it is that you're feeling.
If the pain or experience you are focusing on is particularly intense it is possible to get stuck in the past and the emotions associated such as guilt, worthlessness and/or unlovable.
This is a difficult spot but in order to get out of this make a conscious decision to leave the emotions in the past where they belong, tell yourself that you have done well this time but it is too hard to work on this any more and you will come back to it later.
 Sometimes, especially if the past hurts are associated with abuse or serious trauma then the emotions will be too intense to deal with in this way.
If this is true then the best way to deal with these is through therapy.
However, if you are not ready or prepared for this then there are other ways to deal with this.
Try keeping a journal of your thoughts/feelings associated with that time of your life; often, things that affected us in the past also affect our present and a journal can help to link the two and therefore enable you to move on.
Talk to people you trust - you may find people have been through a similar situation and are able to offer support and guidance.
Finally, many people find creative writing, art or music very effective ways to release deep, intense emotions that may otherwise be too hard to work through.
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