Actions like cooking a meal, setting a table, washing dishes, vacuuming, taking out the garbage, moving the grass, changing the cat's litter tray, etc are all acts of service.
They require thought, planning, time, effort, and energy.
If done with a positive spirit, they are indeed expressions of love.
Within every language, there are many dialects.
If you have a spouse with Acts of Service as her primary love language, find the specific things she would like to you help her with by asking her.
If you are the person with that specific love language, make a list for your spouse with the things that would help you most.
Remember: love is always freely given.
Love cannot be demanded.
Requests give direction to love, but demands stop the flow of love.
Overcoming Stereotypes Learning the love language of acts of service will require some of us to re-examine out stereotypes of the roles of husbands and wives.
Our actions are influenced by the model of our parents, our own personality, and our perception of love, our emotions, needs, and desires.
Only one thing is certain about our behaviour: It will not be the same behaviour we exhibited when we were caught up being 'in love'.
A willingness to examine and change stereotypes is necessary in order to express love more effectively.
Remember, there are no rewards for maintaining stereotypes, but there are tremendous benefits to meeting the emotional needs of your spouse.
If your spouse's love language is ACTS OF SERVICE:

1. Make a list of all the requestsyour spouse has made of you over the past few weeks.
   Select one of theseeach week and do it as an expression of love.
   
2. Cut out some heart-shaped notecards and print the following:"Today I will show my love for you by...
   " Complete the sentence with one ofthe following: mowing the lawn, vacuuming the floor, washing the dishes,taking the dog for a walk, feeding the baby, etc.
   Give your spouse the love note accompanied by the act of service everythree days for a month.
   
3. Ask your spouse to make a list often things he or she would like for you to do during the next month.
   Thenask your spouse to prioritize those by numbering them 1-10, with 1 beingthe most important and 10 being least important.
   Use this list to planyour strategy for a month of love.
   (Get ready to live with a happyspouse.
   )
4. While your spouse is away, get thechildren to help you with some act of service for him.
   When he walks inthe door, join the children in shouting "Surprise! We love you!" Thenshare your act of service.
   
5. What one act of service has yourspouse nagged about consistently? Why not decide to see the nag as a tag?Your spouse is tagging this as really important to him or her.
   If youchoose to do it as an expression of love, it is worth more than a thousandroses.
   
6. If your spouse's requests for actof service come across as nags or put-downs, try writing them in wordsthat would be less offensive to you.
   Share this revised wording with yourspouse.
   For example, "Honey, I love you so much.
   You are a hardworking manand I really appreciate you.
   I'd love to thank you in advance for mowingthe lawn this week before Thursday when Mary and Bob come over fordinner.
   " Your husband might even respond: "Where is the lawn mower, Ican't wait!" Try it and see.
   
7. Do some major acts of service likewashing the car, cooking a meal, painting a bedroom, or washing the deck,and then post a sign that reads, "To (spouse's name) with love," and signyour name.
   
8. If you have more money then time,hire someone to do the acts of service that you know your spouse wouldlike for you to do, such as the lawn, the housecleaning, the car washing,the laundry.
   If you take the responsibility for getting it done, you willbe speaking love even when you are away.
   
9. Ask you spouse to tell you the dailyacts of service that would really speak love to him or her.
   These mightinclude such things as putting your dirty clothes in the hamper, gettingthe hairs out of the sink, hanging up your clothes at night, closing thedoor when you go outside, preparing a meal, and washing the dishes.
   Seekto work these into your daily schedule.
   "Little things" really do mean alot.
   
10. Periodically ask your spouse, "IfI could do one special act of service this week, what would you request?"If possible, do it and watch your spouse's love tank fill up!

(Please also refer to the book 'The five Love Languages' by Gary Chapman)